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Efendiler, hanfendiler.. Şimdi benim son seçimlerle ilgili görüşümü dört gözle beklemediğinizi adım gibi biliyorum. Ama sevgili Hüseyin, bizim adımızı köşe yazarı koydu ya, bir görüş belirtmek şart oldu. Diğer köşe yazarı dostlarımız konuyu enine, boyuna incelemiş ve çok güzel tahliller yapmışlar. Onları tebrik eylerim. Yalnız, benden ciddi tespitler yapmamı beklemediğinizi de biliyorum. Onun için ben size konuya yakın bir masal anlatacağım. Bu masalda adı geçen ülke, kişi, kurum ve kuruluşların gerçekle yakından uzaktan hiçbir ilişkisi yoktur. Bu masalı ben uydurdum iyimi ?

Bir varmış, iki yokmuş. Evvel zaman içinde, saman kalburun içinde, gün olur harman olurmuş, harmanda helva olurmuş, helvayı zenginler yer, helva kabını düşkünler yalarmış. Yumurta tavuğun içinde, tavuk tilkinin midesinde imiş.

Çoook, çoook eski zamanlarda, memleketin birinde toklar az, açlar çokçok imiş. Bebekler borçlu doğar, dedeler öbür dünyaya borçlu gider, giderken de kefenlerini rehin bırakırlarmış. Yürürken bir ileri, iki geri giderlermiş. Bu memlekette guya adı demogırasi olan, 4 yılda bir kelle sayımının yapıldığı bir yönetim varmış. Ama ne hikmetse, bu demogırasiyi de padişah yönetirmiş. Bu ülke de, saf, kurnaz, güldürükçü, kim “ Heeey millet, bizim evde hıyar var “ dese, bir avuç kaya tuzunu alıp koşan, garip bir insan topluluğu yaşarmış. Öylesine gariplermiş ki, yönetenler kendilerini soyup soğana çeviriyor, işsizlikten, açlıktan kırılıyorlar, ürünleri beş para etmiyor, seslerini çıkardıkça da yöneticiler tarafından horlanıyor, azarlanıyor, aşağılanıyor, bir güzel de falakaya yatırılıyor, kulak ve burunları budanıyormuş. Koca vilayetlerde su olmadığı için insanlar tuvaletleri kullanamıyor, affedersiniz sokaklara, boş arsalara rahatlıyor ve taşla siliniyorlarmış. İşbilen işadamlarımız “ taş sektörüne “ giriyor, taş ocaklarından tırlarla taş getiriyor ve tivilerde “ bizim taşımız müthiş, çok çabuk temizler, temizlerken kabanızı çizmez “ türünden reklamlar oynatıyorlarmış. Ama bunca olumsuzluğa rağmen, yöneticilerden biri ( Allah göstermesin ) grip olup burnu aksa, bu garip insan topluluğunun içi sızlar, karalar bağlar, hastanelerin önünde nöbet tutar ve onların mağdur olduğunu düşünüp, onların peşinden giderlermiş. Padişah ve saray ahalisi, okusun ve bu garip topluluğu yönetsin diye çocuklarını ecnebi memleketlere gönderir, fakir – fukara taifesinin çocukları içinde bolca medrese, himam hotip türünden okullar açıyorlarmış.

Bu memlekette, Zol ( Sol demektir ) olan her şey yasakmış. Zola dönmek, zola bakmak, yolların zol şeridinden gitmek, zol yanağı tıraş etmek, zol kulağı kaşımak hepsi yasakmış. Bu memleketin bütün kurum ve kuruluşları, kökü içeride ve dışarıda olanlarla birlik olup zolcuların üzerine gider, insanların zol ayak ve kollarını keser, zol gözlerini çıkarırlarmış. Ne kadar atlı, kılıçlı, toplu tüfekli birlik varsa zolcuları takip eder, iki zolcunun yan yana yürümesine bile izin verilmezmiş. Bütün üniformalı ve üniformasız güçler zolcuları takipten hırsızların, üçkağıtçıların, katillerin, mafyanın, canilerin, din bezirganlarının peşine düşecek zaman bulamazmış. Onlar da boş meydanda cirit atar, at oynatır, istedikleri gibi tepinirlermiş. Bütün güçler özellikle “ din elden gidiyor “ diyen din bezirganlarını besler, onlara yatırım yaparlarmış.. Özellikle, ince bıyıklı, kırmızı yanaklı, pembe dudaklı, gülsuyu kokulu din gardaşlarımız, uzun yıllar boyunca aldıkları bu destekle, cesaretle, yavaş yavaş, kanlımı olacak, sulumu olacak edalarıyla, damardan girerek, çalışarak, didinerek, bütün kurum - kuruluşları ve muslukları ele geçirmişler. Öyle ki vaktiyle onları besleyen, destek verenler azınlık konumuna düşmüşler. İşte o zaman bu destekçi grup neft yağı sürülmüş gibi bağırmaya başlamış ;

- Yetişiiin eeeyy zolcular !.. Demogırasi elden gidiyor, laiklik elden gidiyor !... Ama nafile, ama heyhat, zolcu nerede… Sindirilmiş, örgütleri yerle bir edilmiş, bir kısmı asılmış, bir kısmı faili meçhule gitmiş, kalan bir kısmı fırfırdöndü olmuş, öyle ki zolcudan eser kalmamış. Zolculuktan feragat etmeyen küçük bir grupta “ dinozor “ olarak adlandırılmakta, paramparça, kafası koparılmış tavuk gibi ortalıkta dolaşmaktaymış.

Derken bu ülkede Sadrazam seçimi zamanı gelmiş. Sadrazam adayı geçmişi sebebiyle istenmeyen biriymiş. Bir grup feryadı figan eylemiş. Birileri çıkıp insanları galeyana getirmiş. Yürüyüşler, şunlar bunlar. Başta ki padişah kendinden emin bir şekilde;

- Buyurun eyyy, koyun halkım, seçin bakayım yeni yöneticinizi, bizi seçmeyin de görün ebenizinkini !.. türünden iltifatlar edip, vermiş veriştirmiş. Demogırasinin gereğini yapmış; ülkeyi seçime götürmüş. Herkes padişahın ve sarayın alaşağı olacağını düşünüyormuş ama yanılmışlar; padişah daha da güçlenmiş, silmiş, süpürmüş.

Bu memleketin ileri gelenleri, vaktiyle zolcuları ufalayan bütün gruplar çok böyük hayal kırıklığı yaşamış ve zavallı halka verip veriştirmeye başlamışlar. “ Size her şey müstahak. Her toplum layık olduğu şekilde yönetilir. Yuh olsun ulan size.. vb.. vb. “ demişler.

Oysaki yıllardır izledikleri politikalarla halkı bu noktaya getirdiklerinin bilincinde değillermiş. Olsalar bile suçu üzerlerine almak istemiyorlarmış.

Gelişmeler karşısında iyice çaresiz kalan grup,

- Allam, ey güzel Alllam.. Ne halt eyledik, yıllarca EBD’nin, onun bağlantısı işbirlikçilerin, zenginlerin çıkarlarına hizmet ettik, uşaklığını yaptık. Zolcuları buldozer gibi ezdik, budadık kuşa çevirdik. Adamlar “ hak, hukuk, guguk, aş, iş, eşitlik, tam bağımsız bir memleket, hakların kardeşliği “ gibi şeyler söyleyip durdular. Şimdi düşünüyoruz da, hiçte kötü şeyler söylememişler. Ama iş işten geçti, ne halt eyledik Yarappiii, deyip, saçlarını yoluyor, kafalarını mermerlere vuruyorlarmış. Bir taraftan da sakal bırakıyor, sırasıyla ikinci, üçüncü ve dördüncü evliliklerini yapıyor, onlara da peçe, türban, kara çarşaf, cep telefonu, el si di televizyon ve bilgisayar almak için sipariş veriyorlarmış.

Sonra ne mi olmuş ? Ben ne bileyim kardeşim, masal bu. Yinede sonunu bağlayalım isterseniz. “ Onlar ermiş muradına, biz varalım kerevetine. “ Oldu mu şimdi? Yok olmadı mı, eh benden bu kadar, onu da siz uydurun artık.

Not : Sevgili okurlar, bu memleketi bir yerden gözünüz ısırıyor mu? Valla ben hatırlayamadım..


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Son yorumlar

  • 30.07.2014 09:02
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  • 28.07.2014 08:08
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    Devamını oku...